"History is a nightmare from which I'm trying to awake." - James Joyce

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Grief

I came across this quote on Andrew Sullivan's blog, which I find interesting:

"The interesting thing about grief, I think, is that it is its own size. It is not the size of you. It is its own size. And grief comes to you. You know what I mean? I’ve always liked that phrase He was visited by grief, because that’s really what it is. Grief is its own thing. It’s not like it’s in me and I’m going to deal with it. It’s a thing, and you have to be okay with its presence. If you try to ignore it, it will be like a wolf at your door," - Stephen Colbert, who lost his father at a young age, in a wide-ranging interview with Playboy.

We've all been visited by grief at one time or another, sometimes mild and other times devastating. But I can relate to what Colbert relates here, that sense that grief is something outside ourselves that comes upon us as something we have to deal with. It's certainly not something I want to experience, but it demands an audience and a response. I think it provides us an opportunity to deepen our experience of life and gain wisdom in detaching from things. It provides an opportunity to cultivate compassion, both for oneself and for others. It's a reminder of the consequences of grasping that which cannot be held because all things are impermanent and pass away. As the Buddha found, it is the grasping and craving that creates suffering (including grief). True wisdom teaches us to hold onto life lightly.

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